Believe it or not, I do have my sleepless nights.
It’s a couple of days already that I am feeling tired and exhausted throughout the day and when I finally hit the bed, after all that’s important during the day (love, work, sports, personal growth) rightfully ready to taste some rest… I don’t get to sleep.
I have been analyzing my situation to understand what could be causing this.
Heck, I have been reliving the day which just closed behind me while my eyes open are staring at the dark ceiling and while I keep turning and turning in the bed.
It’s too cold. It’s too warm. I am worried about my financial situation. I am upset with my situation at work. I am concerned that something might happen with my job and that I may be deprived of a steady source of income. I am upset with myself because I did not walk as many steps as I should have. I am upset because I have shouted at my 5 yo son because he was simply being a 5 yo boy. And then I’m upset and afraid of being investing time and money in my digital business without a certain return, day in and day out.
Ah, here it comes then.
After analyzing my situation, I finally find out who the real culprit is. Me. And my fear.
My mind is materializing all possible scenarios of failure in the areas that are most dear to me.
I could fail as a father and a husband.
I could fail as a professional.
I could fail as an entrepreneur.
I could fail as a Man.
But this is NOT the cause. These emotions are only the symptoms of a deeper fear.
The fear of… success.
It sounds exhilarating, right?
Being afraid of actually reaching success and reaping all the good things that we visualize for ourselves when we picture our own success sounds ridiculous…
And yet, there are some moments during my sleepless nights when I feel a strange sense of relief by telling myself “after all, why are you being so hard on yourself? If you don’t succeed with this, it will not be the end of the world! Earth will still keep turning! And you will still have a job and a life to go back to. And you could save that time and money you are not using to grow your savings for the bad times and for your pension… actually, there is a high probability that you won’t succeed so, why appear ridiculous in front of everyone else and keep losing time and money…”
I swear that I hear these voices in my mind!
And for a moment, especially when I feel most exhausted and the only thing I hope for is passing out and enjoy some sleep for at least a few hours, I almost give in and feel comforted by this acceptance of failure.
Because the next image that comes to my mind is that from my exercises of visualization.
I see myself, financially free, with time for my family and for myself, with time to grow as a person, leader, to develop my business, to see my kids grow, to see the world and meet a lot of people and make them proud and happy of being my friends.
This dissolves any thought of accepting failure.
All this is worth it. All this is worth my money, my time and a few sleepless nights.
Accepting failure on this aspirations would mean to give up as a man, as a human being, as a father, and as an example.
And the sense of uneasiness from feeling ‘lost’ and hopeless is replaced by a sense of urgency and a drive to get into action and reach closer to my goals.
Yes, I am not yet where I want to be.
Yes, it will take more steps and more action to get there.
Yes, it will take more time, more money and more sleepless nights.
Yes, I am closer to my goals today than I was yesterday
Yes, I have pushed myself out of my comfort zone
Yes, I have learned something new and valuable and I have taken action
Yes, the goal is worth my time, my money and my nights.
What keeps me awake is not the fear of failure but the fear of not being able to do what it takes to get to where I need to be.
To use Jim Lawless’ expression: these sleepless nights are my ‘tigers’.
Every now and then, these tigers follow me, hiding in the woods of my thoughts, waiting for me to be more vulnerable, at night, and helpless, without any external help.
It’s hard to tame your tigers without some help.
For me, this help comes in the form of equipping myself with all the tools and knowledge and techniques that will make me successful.
And it comes in the form of relationships.
Connecting with other people, the right ones, those who can reinforce the DAILY messages about resilience, perseverance, and consistency.
Listening to the voice of those who want you to succeed and who know that you alone can take the action to dissolve your fears.
The voice of those who hold you accountable to your responsibilities and challenge your leniency towards yourself.
The voice of those who have been there before you and who see through you.
The voice of those who want you to succeed!
Taking action is painful, like the first breath of fresh air of a baby just born.
When we are born into this world, each of us with no exception, we are not used to doing something as ‘simple’ as breathing air.
For 9 months our small bodies in formation and our lungs are deep in the amniotic liquid, being continuously fed, cuddled and sung to: the moment we come to this world, the shock is immense.
Noise. Light. Cold. And that difficult thing with breathing.
We cry because we don’t know what else to do. We cry to shy away from all our pain, stress and fear.
And guess what?
After a few minutes, we start to breathe normally. And then we start eating solid food. Until all this is second nature to us.
And then we move on to higher complexity, to seeing shapes and shadows and the details of our mom’s face and our dad’s brothers’ and sisters’, to moving our bodies trying to catch the colored objects someone placed next to us, to hearing all the noises and being scared when someone sneezes next to us for the first time.
We learn everything and we evolve by doing things that we have never done before and by mastering them before moving on to the next level.
Why, when we grow up, should it be any different?
We are born and live all our life growing and evolving to reach our potential, every day, exactly like babies learn and evolve and adapt every day.
When we decide to let fear win over us taking action, we are giving up on our potential.
We negate that we can become the best possible version of ourselves.
We accept NOT to try.
As His Airness Michael Jordan put it:
I can accept failure, but I can’t accept not trying.
Because I want to reach my full potential.
And I have given myself a measure of that potential by defining my aspirations as follows: I want to live a life of abundance and satisfaction, learning, growing and applying my knowledge to help other people grow and become successful.
THIS is worth a few sleepless nights and helps me tame my tigers when I am most vulnerable to them.
Does it mean that I have NO fear? Absolutely not!
I am still as scared as hell that something, anything, might go wrong along the way.
But I have accepted that risks are a mere consequence of ‘being’. In fact having the same risks but not doing ANYTHING about them would be much worse!
Like in the anecdote of “The Sword of Damocles” from about 3000 (three-thousand) years ago, an allusion to the imminent and ever-present peril faced by those in positions of power.
As WE are because we have power over our own life.
This is comforting because it makes me understand how not everything can and will ever be controlled in full: the only real control I have is of myself and my own actions.
I have chosen to believe that, in the bigger scheme of things, my actions and my beliefs will take me where I need to be.
I know it’s worth it.
Since I have started my journey building a digital lifestyle and business I love, I have found immense relief, support and practical guidance and motivation in an awesome group of people, of friends who are there for me with one objective only: see me succeed because that will be the measure of their own success.
And you don’t need to be ME to embark on the same journey and become a part of this great group of people.
It just takes an email address and a few minutes of your time to watch 7 crisp, concise and compelling videos that will open your door to a new and brighter place, full of hope and opportunity.
This is how I got started to change my life.
This is how I AM changing my life.
This is how I am getting closer to realizing my life aspirations every day.
You can too.
And if you’re reading this article during one of YOUR sleepless nights, let me help you tame your tigers.
Reach your full potential.
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